Days After 4/19/03 Entry

Hey Baby Bro,

I’m trying to honor your memory by writing every day.  I don’t know if you can read this, but if you can, I want to say a couple of things.

First, J___ loved you.  In some ways J—y is a lot like you.  He is also a big mush.  Yes, you heard me, a big MUSH.  He is a sweet, gentle, sensitive soul who you never had to fear replacing you.

Sorry, I got distracted.

Are you seeing things the way they are?  Do you see now that you were SO loved?  Do I love you deeply enough?  You left me too soon and there is no replacement for you.  Did you have a twin?  Did you meed Grandpa?  Ain’t he cute?  Is Dad there?

WHY!

Bro I love you.
Bro I miss you.

WHY!

I’m sorry, please know that I am, and will always be, sorry.

WHY!!!!!!

I’m breathing now, kisses and hugs Sweetie in the most real respect of the words.

Your Sister Alwayz,

Mwah